And she breaks down.............

I just watched Big Love... and it was cathartic. This episode showed how life is far from perfect. And I think we people who hold somewhat romantic notions of parenting and family can often be let down....Today in the Pov life our day was like that.. nothing major.. a typical Sunday... but Mason and CJ continue to have Turf Wars... I know that I am suppose to get two of everything but that works sometimes but not all the times . Sometimes Mason just wants what CJ has because his older brother has it and it has to be better.. and many times they end up screaming and crying.....tonight.. it was over a book.. a Dinosaur Book of course. I tried to share it and read it too both. Mason is just little and hard to rationalize with.. at one point he got angry because CJ was turning the pages of the book slower than he wanted or not to the pages he wanted and hauled off and bit CJ. I screamed. A loud blood curdling scream. They both stared at me kind of shocked... and then we all cried. Chris ran in and said " what happened" and I just cried... it was a release for all different things.. but honestly mostly I was sad and pissed and frustrated and tired. I love to solve problems and this turf war stuff is harder than I expected. I love to have strategies and plans with my kids and I can not seem to get this..... I know in the big picture this is a non issue and that is why I am blogging about it because 20 years from now I will look back and laugh.. but tonight after several days of Turf Wars I am just tired.. and cranky and angry.... and I loved watching BIG LOVE and watching their family vacation fall apart! And I think that is how it is with family.... at least for me.. I am the queen of the romantic notion but at the end of the day it's about being in the moment and experiencing it all.. the good.. the bad.. the ugly and biting! I actually have a smile on my face now... PS: Share suggestions for Turf Wars if you have them.. I am WIDE Open..... friends..... good night! Yep while the rest of the world is watching the Oscars.... I am thinking about bites, and dinosaur books... and how truly unromantic and physically draining raising two young children can be... and through it all I love it.. Tired/ beaten and still sadly in love.............